{"id":270692,"date":"2024-07-08T07:05:00","date_gmt":"2024-07-08T11:05:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/electricliterature.com\/?p=270692"},"modified":"2024-05-20T11:15:29","modified_gmt":"2024-05-20T15:15:29","slug":"10-books-to-read-when-you-cant-stop-thinking-about-that-ex","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/electricliterature.com\/10-books-to-read-when-you-cant-stop-thinking-about-that-ex\/","title":{"rendered":"10 Books to Read When You Can\u2019t Stop Thinking About That Ex"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

There\u2019s this song that I love that I listened to quite a bit in the Fall of 2021. It became a kind of North Star lyric as I was rewriting my novel, Lo Fi<\/a><\/em>, as it encompassed a feeling my narrator was dealing with, fresh off a too-long situationship, trying to forget someone. I wasn\u2019t going through any kind of breakup myself as I wrote, but I needed to channel those same emotions, so I listened over and over.<\/p>\n\n\n

\n
\"\"<\/a><\/figure>\n<\/div>\n\n\n

I\u2019ve found new ways to count the days that you\u2019re not in<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/em>And there\u2019ll come a time when you won\u2019t be on my mind every second<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/em>Doesn\u2019t that count for something?<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

To me, this lyric in the aching title track from Madi Diaz\u2019s History of a Feeling<\/em> captures a sentiment that has given me (and I think many other writers!) end<\/em>less inspiration. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

I have always looked to music and books about romantic heartbreak, those songs and novels that tell you of a complicated relationship that just didn\u2019t, couldn\u2019t\u2014wouldn\u2019t\u2014work out. Or, perhaps one of those ones that never even really got its chance. These books explore the grief of loss, the things we\u2019ll do (often stupidly) for love, and the ways we try to move on and fail. The people or exes that we keep coming back to. If you\u2019ve got someone like this in your life\u2014we probably all do\u2014these are the books you should be reading. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<\/script>\n\n\n\n

Acts of Desperation<\/a><\/em> by Megan Nolan<\/h4>\n\n\n\n

This excellent early-twenties coming-of-age novel set in Dublin zeroes in on a toxic, emotionally abusive relationship. Megan Nolan renders the upside-down power dynamic between the narrator and Ciaran with piercing honesty, allowing the reader to see past the blinders we turn on when we fall in love, the way physical attraction can cloud all our better judgment and the way manipulation and emotional abuse can rot a relationship or person from the inside out. \u201cI was in love with him from the beginning, and there wasn\u2019t a thing he or anybody else could do to change it,\u201d the narrator tells us just a few pages into the novel\u2014and the truth of this becomes very clear. Even at our narrator\u2019s lowest, darkest moments (of which there are many!), I was with her every step of the way, as sucked into the story as one can get in a dark yet addictive relationship. Nolan\u2019s depiction of sex, the body, and love\u2014and the ways we give and take all of these\u2014are what make this book stand out from so many others that have traversed into this territory before. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<\/script>\n\n\n\n

Giovanni\u2019s Room<\/a> <\/em>by James Baldwin<\/h4>\n\n\n\n

Maybe it\u2019s Paris, maybe it\u2019s James Baldwin, maybe it\u2019s a perfect novel. What I would consider to be my favorite \u2018classic\u2019 novel, this taut, heartbreaking story of a covert gay affair between David and Giovanni in 1950s Paris, is one of excruciating love, regret and grief. As David sits in Southern France and tells us the story, we are clear on the stakes from the beginning. There\u2019s much to be drawn to here: the electric yet accessible prose, the snapshots of Paris of another time (desultory, charming, even in its own depression) and of course: the endless pain of a love that could never really be. A masterfully concise read\u2014Baldwin does in 160 pages what most writers try to do in 600\u2014this book (as many know) is a triumph of tragedy. You didn\u2019t need me to tell you this, of course, but after reading it three times in the last handful of years (one in a muddling French!) I\u2019m still amazed at how universal nearly every sentence of this book is. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<\/script>\n\n\n\n

Green Dot<\/a><\/em> by Madeline Gray<\/h4>\n\n\n\n

I read this book earlier this spring in about 48 hours, immediately drawn in by the classic premise: a young woman gets involved in a tumultuous affair with an older, married man (who just so happens to be one of her coworkers.) The affair between Hera and Arthur is mildly predictable in its trajectory\u2014how could it not be?\u2014 but what holds the reader close is Gray\u2019s smart, hilarious and wholly commanding voice. While these types of relationship stories typically have the same arc, as there is mostly only one way for them to end, Gray\u2019s storytelling is anything but. I do not say this lightly: this book is laugh out loud funny, and I almost never<\/em> laugh out loud while reading. The humor and self-awareness will make you root for Hera, even as she makes objectively terrible decisions over and over again\u2014and then makes some more. The sex is good, the consequences are bad, the ending you already know. You should read every word of it anyway. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<\/script>\n\n\n\n

Family Meal<\/a><\/em> by Bryan Washington<\/h4>\n\n\n\n

Bryan Washington\u2019s latest novel is for me, in many ways, a story of how we get through our lowest points of grief and try to make our way to the other side of it, if there is one. Cam has moved from California back home to Houston after his partner of several years, Kai, has died. He muddles through his overwhelming grief with endless sex (and there is a lot of it), self-destructive behaviors, and begins working at his old friend\u2014TJ\u2019s\u2014family bakery. Once he and TJ reconnect, the antagonistic chemistry between them crackles at their first exchange. They hate each other; they love each other. They have learned to live without each other but maybe they don\u2019t have to. Washington writes food beautifully, sex painfully, and makes you ache on every page. <\/p>\n\n\n\n<\/script>\n\n\n\n

Good Material<\/a><\/em> by Dolly Alderton<\/h4>\n\n\n\n

Much has been written about his recent smash success that will be better and wiser than what I could say here, and even though this book is mostly comedic, it is the hardest I have cried reading a novel since A Little Life<\/a><\/em>. Thanks, Dolly. A funny, extremely relatable story of a mid-thirties break-up\u2014told almost <\/em>entirely from the guy\u2019s perspective, Dolly gets everything right about the feelings, thoughts, and actions people experience immediately post-split. I\u2019m talking: drinking alone midday, stalking your ex online, splitting up your shit, closing the joint checking account, drinking alone in the evening\u2014etc.. But what ultimately moved me to tears here was Alderton\u2019s spot-on insight into being in your mid-thirties and finding yourself in a Very Different Place than many of your peers. Everyone knows Dolly Alderton is funny, that she knows relationships better than most, but it\u2019s the heart at the core of this novel that set it apart for me.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<\/script>\n\n\n\n

Search History<\/a><\/em> by Amy Taylor<\/h4>\n\n\n\n

This was one of my favorite releases of last year, by the Australian writer Amy Taylor. A breakup tale for the digital age, the narrator, Ana, begins dating a new guy she meets online after a breakup, and she quickly becomes obsessed with his ex, whom she finds out has died the year prior. It is terrifying and compelling to go down the digital rabbit hole with Ana (we\u2019ve all done it, right? Stalking a new lover\u2019s old flame?) but Taylor renders it all with such an undercurrent of unease as we wonder when the narrator\u2019s obsession will come to light, what consequences it will have. It reminded me of the delicate tension of a Ripley novel, the way Ana stalks in plain sight as we hold our breaths, wondering what she will find. I like that this book turns a breakup narrative on its head: Ana doesn\u2019t stalk her ex<\/em>\u2014in fact, he\u2019s never even named\u2014instead she\u2019s haunted by another woman, one who isn\u2019t even alive. But the frantic obsession still occupies her every thought, making it nearly impossible to actually enjoy her new relationship. In the end, which obsession is worse?<\/p>\n\n\n\n<\/script>\n\n\n\n

Call Me By Your Name<\/em><\/a> by Andr\u00e9 Aciman<\/h4>\n\n\n\n

Try not to think of Timoth\u00e9e Chalamet, peaches, and certainly not Armie Hammer. But instead: think of sitting in the sunshine, think of the first time you fell in love, when you were far too young to know what was going on, when all you understood was the all-encompassing sensation of dopamine and hormones, the insatiable arousal. Now, imagine you live in the Italian countryside, with endless afternoons and stretches of blue sky. It\u2019s a perfect summer, too much time to kill. Aciman\u2019s first person novel is so gorgeous that you should read it basking in the sun yourself if you can. The falling in love is hardly straightforward: a queer sexual awakening complicated by an age and power dynamic, among other things. But Aciman\u2019s prose and the near tangibility of the emotions on the page make me want to reach for this book again and again. Even if you\u2019ve seen the movie, you\u2019ll love reading this book, being reminded of how it feels to fall in love for the first time, and how to cope with the illicit fragility of a relationship like this.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<\/script>\n\n\n\n

Ponyboy<\/a><\/em> by Eliot Duncan<\/h4>\n\n\n\n

I read Ponyboy this Spring at the recommendation of a friend, and it is unlike almost anything I\u2019ve ever read. A story of youth, addiction, love, transitioning, queerness\u2014to me this book is the story of all<\/em> of those people you can\u2019t quite forget. Yes, that one person you loved once, but also everyone that floated in and out around. The people that destroyed you and the people that put you back together, the ones you thought would never disappear but did, and the ones you thought might disappear but didn\u2019t. Ponyboy\u2019s tale is harrowing and heartbreaking\u2014and very difficult to read at times\u2014but the prose is miraculous and the ending is hopeful. It\u2019s poetry, really, and I underlined more than I had in ages.<\/p>\n\n\n\n<\/script>\n\n\n\n

Exhibit<\/a><\/em> by R.O. Kwon<\/h4>\n\n\n\n

Kwon\u2019s latest is an exacting, potent book of desire. The narrator, Jin, is a photographer who we immediately see struggling to produce the photos she\u2019s promised for an upcoming exhibit; she\u2019s been throwing out anything she shoots for ages. Married to a man, she becomes quickly enchanted, drawn to\u2014fascinated by\u2014a ballerina named Lidija. The relationship is charged from the beginning (to say the least) as Jin gets swept into Lidija\u2019s life as we watch their desire unspool. Kwon\u2019s prose is so precise<\/em>, every single word chosen with delicate attention (she took nine years to write the book, and much of it reads like exquisite poetry) but she also writes passion, obsession\u2014yearning\u2014so well that no matter what happens, you are still thinking about this ballerina, this relationship just like our narrator.\u00a0<\/p>\n\n\n\n<\/script>\n\n\n\n

The Price of Salt: Or Carol<\/a> <\/em>by Patricia Highsmith<\/h4>\n\n\n\n

This Patricia Highsmith classic\u2014an illicit lesbian affair set in the 1950s in New York. Here, we follow Therese, who is dating a man she\u2019s obviously barely interested in while working at a department store. The beautiful, mysterious, sexy Carol comes in one day, and from there it is obvious where we\u2019re headed. As the two women grow closer together\u2014and decide what dangers they will wade into for their desire\u2014the story begins to feel more like that of two fugitives on the run across America as tension rises. Accessible and page-turning, this is one of Highsmith\u2019s finest.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

There\u2019s this song that I love that I listened to quite a bit in the Fall of 2021. It became a kind of North Star lyric as I was rewriting my novel, Lo Fi, as it encompassed a feeling my narrator was dealing with, fresh off a too-long situationship, trying to forget someone. I wasn\u2019t […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1807,"featured_media":270817,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"om_disable_all_campaigns":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[5647],"tags":[18,94,279],"class_list":["post-270692","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-reading-list","tag-dating","tag-relationships","tag-romance"],"acf":[],"yoast_head":"\n10 Books to Read When You Can\u2019t Stop Thinking About That Ex - Electric Literature<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"Liz Riggs recommends novels about breakups, heartbreak, and moving on\" \/>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/electricliterature.com\/10-books-to-read-when-you-cant-stop-thinking-about-that-ex\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"10 Books to Read When You Can\u2019t Stop Thinking About That Ex - 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